Straightforward Article About Life of Priests

priestOn The Irish Catholic website, columnist Michael Kelley offers a blunt and direct reflection on the situation in which Roman Catholic priests find themselves adjusting to the pressures and expectations of ministry and life today. For example, I was not aware of the apparent emerging trend of priest-suicides — three in the past year — in Ireland. Although not everyone will agree with everything Kelley suggests about the current state of the ministerial priesthood, it is an article well worth reading. Here’s the beginning:

The death by suicide of Belfast-based Fr Matt Wallace has stunned many people. He is the third Irish priest to take his own life in the last 18 months. People are understandably shocked by the particular circumstances of each tragedy. But when the dust settles around the death of Fr Wallace, and his brother-priests and parishioners begin to pick up the pieces, it’s vital that some good can be brought out of this tragedy. There is a danger that when the shock dies down, we all get back to business as usual and there is no discussion about the wider questions.

For a start, we need to talk about the pressures facing priests in ministry today. Parishioners and bishops need to think seriously about expectations. Many priests are at breaking-point simply keeping the show on the road and there is little or no thought about realistic reform of parish life. While the number of priests serving in many parishes has fallen sharply in recent years, the expectations largely remain the same. In most dioceses, the (usually unsaid) advice is simply to keep one’s head down and get on with things. A culture of deference means that most priests won’t tell the bishop when they’re in trouble and need more support. There’s also a culture of not wanting to bother those in authority. Where problems arise, the solution is often short-term or little more than a sticking-plaster.

Priests are used to biting their lips. They often proceed without complaining. Interactions with their bishops rarely go beyond superficial chit-chat about football matches. There’s usually little room for real talk about pressures in ministry.

Loneliness 

Many priests are lonely. Loneliness, of course, is part of the human condition. But do priests have someone to turn to? Do they have friends with whom they can experience the human need for intimacy and to know oneself to be loved?

Fr Thomas McGlynn put it well at Fr Wallace’s funeral when he observed that more priests face burnout and struggle with loneliness and the realisation “that we belong to everyone and to no one, even though we have the positive and affirming love of families, friends and parishioners”.

Fr McGlynn went on to point out that a “life of service in a bruised and wounded Church can be challenging and is both physically and mentally demanding. It is a hard truth and one that cannot be denied or dismissed and for some it has become intolerable or very difficult to bear”.

Some Catholics have tended to see their priests as Superman-like figures without the same feelings and emotional needs of others. It’s as if the grace of the Sacrament of Holy Orders overrides all human issues. But it doesn’t.

Too many priests are over-extending themselves. Catholics need to question the notions of priesthood that we have created. Is it really healthy that that the men who spend every waking moment running from pillar to post attending meetings, functions and calling bingo numbers are the people we admire as model priests?

Are we forgetting that unless a priest is himself nourished in body and soul, then he will have nothing to give? Sadly, we can all think of examples of priests who appear bitter and resentful, or are simply weary and running on empty having long-since spent themselves in the service of the Lord with little else to give other than a round of constant busyness. How many Irish Catholics are unwilling to approach their parish priest about anything because they don’t want to overburden a man whose life is marked by an almost frantic desire to keep everything going? At the same time, there are many parishioners who keep a vigil-like eye on their priests: “He has a nice sun tan” or “he likes his golf” which are generally offered as stinging critiques rather than casual comments.

Many priests are also over-burdened by expectations of nominal Catholics who no longer attend Mass or practise their faith. While not regular Massgoers, most Catholics in Ireland still want their children baptised, want to get married in the Catholic Church and want a Catholic funeral. Most of these people have little or no awareness of the challenges facing the local priest since they rarely – if ever – darken the door of the church. Yet, the sense of expectation that a priest will be available at a moment’s notice is palpable. Many parishes are also under financial pressure since many of those who avail of the services on an infrequent basis don’t contribute to the parish.

Criticism 

We need to be realistic and name the fact that the last number of years have been very demanding and demoralising on priests. Many are subject to constant carping and criticism: there are not enough Masses, there is not enough home visits, there needs to be something more for young people…and it goes on.

Since Vatican II we have increasingly talked about co-responsibility between people and priests for the future of the Church. While it’s true that some priests are resistant to this, too many parishioners are also content to be passive. They look on at the increasing workload of priests and the declining numbers as if they are mere observers rather than people empowered by Baptism to take responsibility for the Church.

The issue of clerical sexual abuse and the disastrous handling of allegations by bishops and religious superiors has also had a devastating effect on priests. Many feel subjects of public suspicion and a sense of being sitting ducks vulnerable to false allegations and rumours. Research shows that the general public vastly overestimates the number of priests who have abused children. This is very wearing. Many priests feel demoralised by the fact that they were not responsible for any mishandling of abuse, but live now in the knowledge that bishops are so keen to be seen as squeaky clean on the issue, the last place they will get support from in dealing with a false allegation is their bishop …

Read the Rest Here: “We Need to Talk About Priests

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5 Responses to “Straightforward Article About Life of Priests”

  1. Ministry has always been a challenge. I admire those who serve in ministry and those who have served. By far, clergy persons are one of the most giving of professionals. A profession with great personal demands also requires high self care. Yet, we maintain institutional requirements that make living as a whole person nearly impossible. We tell adult men where they will live and with whom they will live. Add requirements to live where one works, only adds stress. This is not even beginning to look at requirements for celibacy nor lessened respect given to the clergy. The breath of God needs to breathe a new spirit into the Church to bring new life to the ministry and life of the members of the Church and its clergy.

  2. Jane Pelletier Says:
  3. MARY ANN BURKE Says:

    Excellent post, Fr. Dan! We do not always think about all that our Friars do every day.

  4. URBAN DIOCESAN PRIESTS SHOULD THINK ABOUT LIVING IN COMMUNITY. ‘TWOULD BE ONE ANSWER TO THE LONELINESS MANY FEEL (AND CREATE OTHER PROBLEMS. BUT THEY WOULD BE THE HUMAN PROBLEMS ENCOUNTERED IN OTHER COMMUNITIES, LIKE. E.G THE FAMILY.

  5. I am so saddened by this. I do an increasing amount of suicide prevention work, having lost a son to suicide five years ago, and am well aware of the stigma and misinformation and lack of information that prevent people from seeking the care they need when depression threatens their lives. As a pastor, even with a husband and adult children, I can say that many aspects of parish life conspire to make it a lonely path. And as a person who has been blessed by the friendship of several priests, I am disheartened to discover that they are members of yet another population so affected by what has become a mental health catastrophe.

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